I will be having a session with a client whose partner passed. The soul, the spouse, will tell me my client is here and they have begun their new life free of the illness that took them.
The soul will in some way give my client permission to find some joy again. Let me say, I don’t tell my client they should move on, I know they will find a way to deal with the passing of their partner in their own way.
Some will get into a new relationship here, while others have no desire other than to find a friend. Whatever that is, is up to them and they will deal with things in their own time.
Today I want to address two clients, two men who lost their wives after a long illness. Both men stayed by the side of their wives and did everything they could for them.
Both men have adult children, and their children helped when they could, but they had their own families to take care of. They have no idea what it was like to be there day to day, helping and caring for their sick wives. The children have no idea the pain and often the depression their dads were struggling with, they can’t because their relationship with mom is very different and the pain is not the same.
Once the wives of both these men passed, they spent about a year trying to recover from the years of pain, worrying about their wives. Yes, the adult kids were there for them but couldn’t be there every day, every moment. They may think they can relate to what Dad was going through, but not really.
Both these men found a companion to spend time with. I should say that at this point, both these men are retired and have a lot of free time. The companions they found also lost a spouse, and they understand what each other is going through. They supported each other and breathed life back into each other. This worked for both these men & the women they were involved with.
When the adult children found out their dads were in a relationship, they attacked their dads for finding someone else. They didn’t like it, they were treating it like their dads were cheating on their moms. That isn’t the case & the souls understand, they are there & we are here. They want us to continue on and live the best we can.
They aren’t fair to their dads, no matter what they think, the truth is the children are being selfish by not accepting dad has found someone to spend time with. Accept your dads relationship. Dad knows how to handle it, no one is going to take advantage of these men.
Let dad be, let life take its course, one of these men eventually ended the relationship.
He did that on his own, so my message to these adult kids, let dad live his life, let him find some joy for however long it takes. Don’t blow up your relationship with your dad by attempting to control his life because that is what you’re doing. Dad will never forget Mom, she will always have a special place in his heart, so do you. Please don’t add to his pain, by pushing dad away you will not have just lost your mom but your dad as well. Is it that important you do this?
Always remain hopeful, never hopeless, always be optimistic, never pessimistic.