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I’m going to stop doing this


I was fed up, depressed, angry and done being a caulbearer. Yes, I knew I would have to live with these gifts whether I shared them or not.

I was getting ready to do my self-hypnosis as I laid down, I told myself I was done and I would put more energy into my photography business. I felt this had no purpose, I made no difference in people’s lives. I wasn’t sure about the messages I get and me being me, I always want more. I just never accept the fact the souls give me the messages they want you to hear. I always ask them for more but I get what they want me to have period.

So, I lay down and start my journey. My panacea is Eagle Lake Maine, I leave the cabin go down the stairs get in a boat, say hello to the moose that is always there, I have no idea why. The moose is quite 99% of the time but when he speaks there is always a reason. He said to me, ”you have to get going”.

I always get in a boat head up the lake, I step onto shore by a small stream and begin my walk through the woods up to the top of the mountain which overlooks a beautiful wooded valley.

Not this time, this time I step on shore and I am in a deep fog, I was afraid to move onto the dangerous terrain. Suddenly I hear a soft voice say, “keep walking”; I say I can’t it’s to dangerous.  I followed the direction of the voice and keep walking. The next thing I know I am at the mountain top. This time it’s a desert valley with what looks like thousands of people. I am not sure if they are symbolic of people here or past. The soft voice tells me, “You can’t stop doing this. See these people, they are the people you are here to help.”  

The phone rang and took me out of my vision. Being a skeptic the next day I said to myself, if that was my imagination, I will be able to get back there and see if there was a message in all this. Well, I went back stepped on land it was clear as usual. I heard the soft voice again, telling me, “believe what happened yesterday”. I was confused but figured I should consider following the voices directions, but my plan was to not continue on my Caul journey yet I was going to be open to the message, even though I still wasn’t sure it was real or imagined.

Fast forward about two weeks, I was doing a party with seven women who were getting 30-minute sessions. The second to the last woman, Cathy, is standing up off the chair when we finished; she sits back down looks at me and said, “you can’t stop doing this.” I was surprised, I asked her if I said anything about that to her? She said,” No, I don’t know why I said that.”

I have seen Cathy several times since then, we speak about it and she has no reason why she said that, it just came to her ( think she has some of the gift). I knew this was a very strong sign the answer to my questions, because I was preparing for this to be my last interaction with people as a caul. 

I am still here doing this with no plans to stop. If you watch Brenda and Frankie’s videos, they both speak about what I did for them, both especially Brenda whose session was a true awakening for me giving me the strength to continue on.

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